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Author Archives: 34orion
The Real Screwworm:
In which the efficiency experts save fifteen million dollars and spend a billion finding out what the fifteen million was for. Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Donald Trump, food, health, nature, political commentary, politics, screwworm, trump
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Additions to the Highlight Reel, Before the Nation Gets Relegated
Sports gives us highlight reels. Politics gives us blooper reels with subpoenas.
This week, the Knicks added one to the good reel. Now I’m hoping for two more: Brazil’s sixth star and a Blue Tsunami big enough to remind Team USA that the coach is supposed to lead the team, not admire himself during the timeout. Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged baseball, Donald Trump, mlb, nba, political satire, politics, Sports, writing
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No Good Deeds
A black-and-white movie from 1936 accidentally explains everything that’s wrong with America in 2026.
When Longfellow Deeds inherited a fortune, the question was what responsibility came with wealth. Today, billionaires seem to think responsibility is something other people pay for.
How did we get from Gary Cooper’s America to Elon Musk’s? Grab a drink and come down the rabbit hole.
#Politics #Economics #WealthInequality Continue reading
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Tagged elon-musk, government, political commentary, politics, trump, writing
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The Department of His Justice
The Department of His Justice” — a cheerful little tour through weaponized prosecutions, loyalty payouts, and what happens when norms meet a narcissist with subpoena power. Continue reading
Posted in Humor / satire, personal essay, Politics and Society, Social Media, Trump Opposition
Tagged Donald Trump, history, news, political commentary, politics, trump
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Six Years Ago, Today
Six years ago I flew home from pandemic lockdown in Brazil believing America still knew the difference between leadership and a late-stage infomercial host with a persecution complex.
I was wrong.
A little jet lag, a little heartbreak, a little rage, and just enough dark humor to survive reading the headlines. If you’ve ever looked at the news and thought “how did we get HERE?” — this one’s for you. 🇺🇸🔥
Read before they replace the Statue of Liberty with a gold-plated grievance monument. Continue reading
Posted in covid, Humor / satire, institutional poverty, opinion, personal essay, Politics and Society, Social Media, Trump cuts
Tagged brazil, family, life, travel, writing
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Term Limits or Pitchforks
Congress has officially evolved into America’s premier retirement community for the backbone deficient. Sponsored by Amazon. Continue reading
VE Day: The Thread We Lost
Seventy-five million people died in World War II. The men who stormed those beaches didn’t do it so we could debate eighty-one years later whether what’s happening here qualifies as fascism. They did it so we would know it when we saw it. Continue reading
Posted in Politics and Society
Tagged germany, history, iran, political commentary, politics, trump, war
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Meet John Doe
I was searching for comfort on my streaming services the other day. You all know what kind of a week it has been. You get the point. And while we are at the point-making part of this ditty, you may … Continue reading
Blame it on Rio 
It Could Have Been a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week
The week gave us screwworms, algae, and a Qatari Air Force One. Thursday gave us something the Grifter-in-Chief will never have Continue reading →