Author Archives: 34orion

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About 34orion

Winston Churchill once said that if you were not a liberal when you were young you had no heart, and if you were not a conservative when you were older then you had no brain. I know I have both so what does that make me?

The Green Flash

Life, took place on the flat screens of your computer, tablet, and phone. Zoom calls, Facetime and Skype were your only connections to the outside world and while they were godsends of technology, they contributed to a sense that reality was not a tangible thing. It only existed in your mind’s eye. Continue reading

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The Green Flash

“The point is in mourning for my father I appreciated all of him.  Understanding who he was and why he was that way gave me a purpose that allowed me to navigate my grief better. It was his final gift to me and like so many things he gave me I can’t thank him. My point to you nephew is your father had his faults. Embrace them and let them humanize him. There is no question it will help with the pain but maybe you will get lucky, like me, and it will provide you with a bigger purpose.” Continue reading

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The Green Flash

“Don’t you dare get pissed at me. I have earned the right to tell you the truth. It may not be the truth as you see it. And feel free to tell me to fuck off and I don’t know what I am talking about. But remember for forty years I have had your back. Always. Still do. But that makes it my responsibility to do right by you. Not to be nice and tell you what you want to hear but be kind enough to tell you the truth as I see it.” Continue reading

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The Green Flash

“I needed to find peace in the thought that with love comes loss. If you love or allow yourself to be loved, there will come a time where you be devastated by the loss of that love. It is the price of admission.” Continue reading

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The Green Flash

I woke up just as the train was leaving Stanford. My seatmate was still fully engrossed by her spreadsheet. Tying to be the hale and hearty fellow traveler I asked, “I am going up to the club car for a cup of coffee may I bring you back something?” Not even taking the time to look up from her computer screen she replied frostily no thank you.” As I made my way through the rocking train to get my coffee, I thought to myself “What a bitch.” Continue reading

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Chapter 10

You have to take some of that responsibility. You can’t put it all on him. I don’t see you owning up to your mistakes. What I see, what I have seen since this cluster fuck of a divorce started is each of you blaming the other for why your marriage fell apart instead of each of you accepting you fucked up. That it was too far gone to fix. And instead of saying we had our time, we have two great boys and some good memories, you both went about trying to destroy each other. A divorce that could have been over in months didn’t end until it killed Conor.” Continue reading

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The Green Flash

I’ve been blessed with more notice, to prepare for my own mortality than most people get. And so, I’ve worried that some of my loved ones have postponed or passed on experiences that might cause them to be absent when I die. That’s fucked. There’s no unfinished business. I know how they love me. And my friends and family know I love them.

I hate the long tearful goodbye thing. And I hate when people wreck parties by thinking that their goodbyes are important enough to stop the dancing. I perfected my Irish exit departures long before I knew they were a thing. Continue reading

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The Green Flash

Initially, we thought the roar we heard was just errant air traffic but then someone ran through our offices telling us that the World Trade Center was on fire. Everyone in the office ran to our southern windows to see. We were standing there seventeen minutes later, when we saw a fire ball erupt from the South Tower. We thought it was an explosion. We could not see that it was another airplane blasting its way through the South tower. Continue reading

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Chapter 8

The pity party was back on. I was in the graveyard of times gone by, of long-ago memories, and questions never asked, in the home of a newly departed mother whose scent still filled the house. Now I had a friend to grieve. And, I was alone. My wife was thousands of miles away. My sister locked down in Covid protocols. There was no one to give me the hug that I needed at that moment, which would have solved everything and nothing at all. I could have filled my thoughts with positives affirmations about how good I had it compared to so many other, but I didn’t have the energy. So, I hugged myself and wept. Continue reading

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Chapter 8

His life was the fairytale I wanted. Or at least thought I wanted. But it was all an illusion. A piece of fiction. His marriage was a sham. Two people pretending that they loved each other until they could no longer put on a show for the rest of us. Façade gone, it revealed two combatants, locked in mortal combat, each one desperate to prove who was right and frantic to claim every spoil of war they could find. Their battlefield had cratered my friend’s life. It had taken his livelihood, his children, his health and thrust him into the arms of a siren whose song had shipwrecked him and left him to drown Continue reading

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